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God have mercy

September 28th, 2008 in Crazy Xians by lpcoverlover |

The Faith Tones sing “Jesus Use Me”

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  1. #1 Bobaloo says:
    September 28th, 2008 at 8:45 pm

    The higher the hair, the closer to JAY-sus!

  2. #2 Way Back Now! Lets Go... says:
    September 28th, 2008 at 8:57 pm

    If I looked like these mugs I’d let more than Jesus use me.
    Is that Jay Leno with a wig?

  3. #3 Keir Hardie says:
    September 28th, 2008 at 9:39 pm

    Terrifying.

  4. #4 jerzy says:
    September 28th, 2008 at 10:15 pm

    Can’t believe The Mothers’ FreakOut didn’t make the cut. Susie creamcheese, what’s got into you?

  5. #5 Evan says:
    September 28th, 2008 at 11:40 pm

    Is that Peter Sellers?

  6. #6 Oxhead says:
    September 29th, 2008 at 8:35 am

    The precursor to their more popular album “Come Inside Me Jesus”

  7. #7 Thinkerer says:
    September 29th, 2008 at 8:58 am

    Are those female? Humans?

  8. #8 glauberovsky says:
    September 29th, 2008 at 10:51 pm

    haaaaaaahahahahaha…these comments are priceless

  9. #9 Ba5tarD says:
    September 30th, 2008 at 5:32 am

    Wow! This is brutal.

  10. #10 Louis says:
    September 30th, 2008 at 6:18 am

    I’m Blind! I’m Blind !

  11. #11 Little Kid says:
    September 30th, 2008 at 7:39 am

    None of those are women. Even if they went on a make-over show they’d still end up as men with emotional problems.

    If these three sang at me I’d convert to Islam immediately.

  12. #12 Zillagord says:
    September 30th, 2008 at 2:09 pm

    Not Kids In The Hall, but an amazing reproduction!

  13. #13 Susskins Central Dispatch » Blog Archive » How Times Change says:
    September 30th, 2008 at 8:20 pm

    [...] This one’s a doozy. Keep away from open flames, girls! [...]

  14. #14 psychomar says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 11:46 am

    Brendan Fraser on the right much?

  15. #15 cleek says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 12:56 pm

    those must be wigs, right ?

  16. #16 Nick Gisburne says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 2:45 pm

    Jesus use me… because nobody else will come anywhere near me

  17. #17 Cliff G. says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 2:49 pm

    Actually, the one in the middle looks more like Jimmy Kimmel.

  18. #18 Reed says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 3:30 pm

    I’m confident that no chaperon was needed on this tour.

  19. #19 manboobchoir says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 5:12 pm

    Their previous album was “Jesus Feed Me”…. and he did.

  20. #20 Rufio says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 6:12 pm

    The one on the right has that look of having just stepped into the immediate path of an oncoming truck but not having quite processed the consequences of aforementioned action. Smash.

  21. #21 Jack Sprat says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 6:55 pm

    I’m in love for the first time, don’t you know it is going to last. It’s a love that will last forever its a love that has no past. So don’t let me down, don’t let me down!

  22. #22 jayjay says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 7:05 pm

    You guys are just being mean. I think they are cute, especially the one with glasses

  23. #23 Oy Yoy Yoy says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 7:09 pm

    Mrs Miller proteges, no doubt

  24. #24 A. Wilmarth says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 7:15 pm

    horrific

  25. #25 Damion says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 7:31 pm

    Yikes…They are some handsome sisters!

  26. #26 g-love says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 7:39 pm

    I was one of the roadies on their “Christ on the Cross-Country” tour. The middle one would usually yell “Jesus use me!” while in the throes of passion with a regular Jesuit groupie. She sure did love something, I don’t think it was the lord.

  27. #27 el smrtmnky says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 8:38 pm

    and Jeebus wept…

  28. #28 Weird Stuff Online » The Faith Tones: “Jesus Use Me” LP cover says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 8:39 pm

    [...] The Faith Tones: “Jesus Use Me” LP cover [...]

  29. #29 Kevin Seward says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 9:28 pm

    Yes, def. crossdressers.

    Which puts them then (and now) way out in the vanguard.

    Give it up, Faith Tones.

    Thanks for the LP coolness.

  30. #30 Tom Tuerff says:
    October 1st, 2008 at 10:10 pm

    This is why, after Jesus comes back, if he wants to hear songs about himself, he’s going to hang out in the Black neighborhood.

    TT

  31. #31 DerMika says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 3:09 am

    She’s a dude!

  32. #32 furiousBlog - in my diatribe » Blog Archive » rock star poses says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 8:39 am

    [...] God Have Mercy [...]

  33. #33 Dickie Ray says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 9:18 am

    The sidemen on “Mother’s Little Helper.” Dude! Make up and wigs ain’t no thang!

  34. #34 RVerano says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 9:28 am

    I wonder if Jesus ever took them up on that offer?

  35. #35 Gibt’s eigentlich ein Sex-Tape von Jesus? says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 10:01 am

    [...] (via) Bookmarks: Kategorie(n): Fundstück, Lustiges Tags (Schlagworte): böse, ekelhaft, Frauen, gott, Jesus, Lustiges, seltsam, Sex, verrückte-welt, Video « Zu scharfes Essen gibt’s nicht! Oder vielleicht doch? || [...]

  36. #36 Paul says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 11:13 am

    No, it’s clearly Stephen Fry.

  37. #37 Daliphucker says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 11:22 am

    Hey it’s Keith Wigdor! Holy JAYSUS!

  38. #38 been_used says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:06 pm

    That guy on the right is my ex-husband!

  39. #39 ghghgh says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:12 pm

    I’d hit that one in the middle…

    WITH A BRICK!

  40. #40 Jesus says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:15 pm

    “Ye are used”

  41. #41 DulceDeMentia says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:28 pm

    Let me guess, the one in the middle is the cute one all the boys fall for?

  42. #42 Calikinakka says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 2:32 pm

    Psychomar I was thinking the EXACT same thing.

  43. #43 Tom says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 2:37 pm

    Those are men, baby!

  44. #44 braillettes says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 2:38 pm

    Compare them with the Braillettes whose cover is in the Web site of “Worst albums ever”

  45. #45 Reinhardt says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 3:57 pm

    Perhaps a new big budget movie starring Brendan Frazier, John Travolta and Drew Carey ?

  46. #46 Daniel Almada says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 4:09 pm

    Thirty Helens agree: Baby-Blue Terrycloth and Big hair are “in” this season!

  47. #47 mac lives says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 4:18 pm

    Oh my G-D! Don’t they have mirrors or did the mirrors shatter when they looked into them?????

  48. #48 DaLoneGroover says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 4:32 pm

    What has been seen cannot be un-seen. Save me baby Jebus!!!

  49. #49 SheWalksSoftly says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 5:26 pm

    Thanks so much for posting this! I thanked you on my own blog!

  50. #50 Woozy Floozy says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 5:43 pm

    I laughed like an idiot… priceless… I bet they’d make millions if they ditched the middle one though, doesn’t seem like true Jesus material

  51. #51 choirboy says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 6:59 pm

    Oh, thanks people. Do I make fun of your mom? Noooooo

  52. #52 fellomar says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 7:37 pm

    You can’t tell me that the one with the glasses isn’t giving birth to the AntiChrist..

  53. #53 xyzzy says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 7:39 pm

    With a face only a deity could love

  54. #54 bentonmeshnup says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 7:52 pm

    Hey, I went to high school with those dudes. High hair school, that is. Hardee Har Har hearty hair hairy whooee phooeey hoo hoo poo poo doo doo phphphpht oh mamaphukeehuckeephukahuckasheat.

  55. #55 Tad Nauseam says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 8:10 pm

    No second coming now, fer sher…

  56. #56 harry says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 8:27 pm

    MY EYES…. IT BURNSS….. AARRGGHHHH

  57. #57 Annie Gore says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 9:08 pm

    LMAO at Oxhead’s comment!

  58. #58 Jim says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 9:12 pm

    Beware! They are alien Coneheads in disguise. The hair is a coverup.

  59. #59 Sarah Palin says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 9:54 pm

    If Jesus heard this album, he’d convert to Islam…

  60. #60 joker says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 9:55 pm

    That’s not a woman, that’s a man baby!

  61. #61 Bock's Car says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 4:25 am

    Lord have mercy…

    >From LP Cover Lover…

  62. #62 Mary Poppins says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 4:26 am

    Oh, poor Jesus!!!!

  63. #63 Airbag says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 5:27 am

    I´m crying out loud!…And thank god i´m from sweden, this could only happen in US??

  64. #64 bentonmeshnup says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 7:50 am

    A short list of anagrams for “The Faith Tones” — Fit to Heathens — Heathen of Tits — Fist to Heathen — Sheathe Fit Not — Faintest Hot, Eh — Hot Hen Fatties — Fattiest Hen Ho — A Heft Hoe Stint — A Heft Sho’en Tit — A Heft Tithes On — A Heft No Theist — Thine Sot a Heft — Hefts Hit a Note — A Heft’s Hot Nite — A Thief’s Tent Ho — That Finest Hoe–Heist Hat Often — Hat Feint Those — Hi Hat Oftenest — Tone Thief Shat — Fish Oath Tenet — Thin Feet Shoat — Fittest One Hah — Heft Shit A Tone — Heat Shit Often — Often Hates Hit.

  65. #65 Jason says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 7:50 am

    I think I could work with the one on the left. I bet if she lost a little weight and got a hair cut she would be cute.

  66. #66 Joe-Coop says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 8:14 am

    WWJD? He’d run like hell!

  67. #67 krsna says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 9:34 am

    Are they barbers?

  68. #68 Jesus says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 9:42 am

    Use you? I wouldn’t even touch you if you were a leper. It looks like some bee’acth gave birth to a yeast infection. I’ve shot goobers out my nose that looked more appetizing.

  69. #69 versitalex says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 11:21 am

    Dude on the right looks like John Lithgow.

  70. #70 Lightbulb says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 11:35 am

    So the first title ” Jaws: The Musical” was dropped i see…

  71. #71 l3bowsk1 says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    Ok, from left to right: Brendan Fraser, Michael Ian Black, and Brian Posehn. Totally nailed it, right?

  72. #72 shrub says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 2:13 pm

    Those ‘natural-look’ crash helmets never really caught on but they clearly found favor with the sixties transvestite scene.

  73. #73 perko says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 6:39 pm

    the one on the left is the most beautiful

  74. #74 nemo maritime says:
    October 3rd, 2008 at 9:28 pm

    ewwwwwwwwwwww

  75. #75 Lakeside skipper says:
    October 4th, 2008 at 12:15 am

    I would like to hear this record.

  76. #76 EdBeg says:
    October 4th, 2008 at 9:16 am

    #40 haaaaaa perfect

  77. #77 glauberovsky says:
    October 5th, 2008 at 1:55 am

    #38 been_used says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:06 pm

    That guy on the right is my ex-husband!

    #39 ghghgh says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:12 pm

    I’d hit that one in the middle…
    WITH A BRICK!

    #40 Jesus says:
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:15 pm

    “Ye are used”

    haaaaaaaaaahahahahahaahahahahaha…you people kill me. 75 comments?? it’s a hit! praise the lord!

  78. #78 ratata says:
    October 5th, 2008 at 10:56 am

    hot damn i can almost see cleavage

  79. #79 iodine9 says:
    October 6th, 2008 at 1:39 pm

    what’s with the smocks they wear? is that all part of the cult outfit? did amy grant ever do a cover version?

  80. #80 Rhinobird says:
    October 6th, 2008 at 9:37 pm

    dear lord they look like these guys:

    Tobey McGuire: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001497/

    Sean Astin: http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2455083008/tt0120737

    Eddie Kaye Thomas: http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2902693376/nm0858776

  81. #81 Kelly Kelly says:
    October 8th, 2008 at 9:11 am

    This is priceless!
    The one on the right looks like Buddy Holly.

  82. #82 Dmander says:
    October 8th, 2008 at 11:15 am

    Hep me Jebus

  83. #83 LouLou says:
    October 8th, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    They must all be bald now. Hair is not made to survive that kind of trauma!

  84. #84 Bunny Gargantuan III says:
    October 8th, 2008 at 10:09 pm

    OMG…… it’s Trinity Broadcasting Network’s Jan Crouch times three on crack!!

  85. #85 Bunny Gargantuan III says:
    October 8th, 2008 at 10:12 pm

    RE: #64 bentonmeshnup says: “A short list of anagrams for “The Faith Tones” — Fit to Heathens — Heathen of Tits — Fist to Heathen — Sheathe Fit Not — Faintest Hot, Eh — Hot Hen Fatties — Fattiest Hen Ho — A Heft Hoe Stint — A Heft Sho’en Tit — A Heft Tithes On — A Heft No Theist — Thine Sot a Heft — Hefts Hit a Note — A Heft’s Hot Nite — A Thief’s Tent Ho — That Finest Hoe–Heist Hat Often — Hat Feint Those — Hi Hat Oftenest — Tone Thief Shat — Fish Oath Tenet — Thin Feet Shoat — Fittest One Hah — Heft Shit A Tone — Heat Shit Often — Often Hates Hit.”

    Oh Jeezus H Keyhrist on a 3000 horsepower rocket-powered sled in the Nevada Test range! Those anagrams nearly had me pee’ing myself laughing!

  86. #86 hanmarche says:
    October 12th, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    Brotha on the right looks like Jeebus put a big ole’ stick up his butt.

  87. #87 Alan says:
    October 18th, 2008 at 7:32 am

    The tragic consequences of self abuse….

  88. #88 Steve says:
    October 19th, 2008 at 1:50 pm

    Wow, Christ, I can smell the Aqua Net…cough cough

  89. #89 Fabio Marton says:
    October 20th, 2008 at 11:22 am

    Missing a comma:

    Jesus, USE ME!

  90. #90 xtabay says:
    October 20th, 2008 at 7:51 pm

    I love bad record covers. I’ve featured this on my site.

    No wonder Jesus is delaying the second coming, hell he wouldn’t have even had a first coming with this lot.

  91. #91 Harvey says:
    October 20th, 2008 at 10:32 pm

    From left:

    Rory Cochran:
    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0168262/

    Phillip Seymour Hoffman:
    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000450/

    John Lithgow
    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001475/

  92. #92 Bob S says:
    October 21st, 2008 at 10:59 am

    Oh HELL no!

    Looks like Satan used them before Jesus did.

    I think the one on the right is a young Joyce Drake of the infamous “Joyce” LP:

    http://www.blackgemrecords.com/gallery/v/solditems/joyce.jpg.html

  93. #93 virgil f says:
    October 22nd, 2008 at 6:11 pm

    Well if someone already has dibs on the one with glasses, then I guess I call the one with the Adams apple.

  94. #94 Lemoncat says:
    October 23rd, 2008 at 8:45 am

    if you were worried about alien invasion…you can relax now :)

  95. #95 Blondacious says:
    October 23rd, 2008 at 4:47 pm

    Wow thats where the three stooges ended up…….sex change operations

  96. #96 Blondacious says:
    October 23rd, 2008 at 4:48 pm

    just think…….these are someones moms now….haha

  97. #97 Mike says:
    October 23rd, 2008 at 7:01 pm

    Big Hair = Big Scare! I bet if you hit all three hair-does with a mallet they would each ring a tone for Jesus. The Faith Domes!

  98. #98 MadMadamMim says:
    October 23rd, 2008 at 9:48 pm

    Those are some unfortunate-yet-accurate-looking representatives for Christianity.

    Let’s face it, the only way all that “saving it for marriage” shit actually works, is when pussy looks like those turkeys up there. Jesus hates recreational sex, so he makes sure no one wants to have it by creating horrible monstrosities.

    Haha, you know when you’re like 11yrs old and you ask your grandfather what your grandmother looked like when she was young? You always assume she started out okay and then just melted with time… The truth can be hard.

  99. #99 CJP says:
    October 24th, 2008 at 10:47 am

    Don’t flick that Bic lighter near these hotties, OK? They’ll be “blowed-up-real good”. Is this one in Ozzie Osbourne’s record collection? Ha Ha ha!

  100. #100 CJP says:
    October 24th, 2008 at 12:17 pm

    That’s it, I’m ditching my ACDC, Black Sabbath, & Led Zeppelin records for classics like Jumpin’ Jesus Flash, Stairway To Hell, and Ironman (Sees The Light).

    PRAISE JAY-ZUS!

  101. #101 Donna Lethal says:
    October 25th, 2008 at 1:49 pm

    The one on the right looks like one of the Benny Hill guys (Henry McGee?) in drag.

  102. #102 xtabay says:
    October 26th, 2008 at 11:45 pm

    Lets face it Jesus is their only hope for a date.

  103. #103 Doug says:
    November 1st, 2008 at 1:25 pm

    I sat here looking at them and drinking…..
    after a while they don’t look that bad!
    make me some more wine Jesus.

  104. #104 herman_the_german says:
    November 26th, 2008 at 4:13 pm

    The Smart One, The Quiet One and the Other One.

  105. #105 rob doomsday says:
    December 8th, 2008 at 11:18 pm

    no way man, this is not women, I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THEY ARE

  106. #106 Me a moi says:
    January 6th, 2009 at 8:38 am

    …And thus, Christianity collapsed as Jesus decided it was time to convert to Hinduism.

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