Gossamer Wump  (Told by Frank Morgan)   Music by Billy May!  Capitol Records (1949)

GOSSAMER WUMP wanted to play the triangle ever since he watched a marching band. So his mother packed up 27 peanut butter sandwhiches and put them and his dog George into a suitcase and sent them to the famous music school to study playing the triangle. After ten years Professor Cutty Nutty Dump felt GOSSAMER was doing very good but GOSSAMER had to leave as he was out of sandwhiches. Well he got a job in Gaylord Gout’s band but was fired after hitting Gaylord on the head with his triangle’s hammer. But GOSSAMER wasn’t discouraged and decided to go to the big city and went to see the Famous conductor Sanislof Hudnutt and was immediately hired to play a solo. GOSSAMER was so excited that he forgot to put on his belt so he had to hold up his pants with one hand and every time he played the triangle he would let go of his pants; they would fall down; he would strike the triangle and then grab his pants and pull them up again. Well, finally the whole audiance was laughing and poor GOSSAMER ran from the stage in disgrace. However a very important man followed him and because he felt that GOSSAMER was so good he offered him a job. Now, you’ve probably heard GOSSAMER because everytime the icecream wagon goes by, “DING, DING, DING”, that’s GOSSAMER WUMP

(32 votes, average: 3.75 out of 5)

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